


Never You, Always We

by Fourteen_NinetyOne



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Anxiety, Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, M/M, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-26
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2021-01-03 14:42:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21181136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fourteen_NinetyOne/pseuds/Fourteen_NinetyOne
Summary: Tyler's slump is starting to get to his head. Jamie comforts him.





	Never You, Always We

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This is all fictional, if you found it by googling your name, you know where the back button is.
> 
> A/N: I wrote this a few weeks ago, they have mental health awareness month in Australia during October. Even though I think you should just genuinely check up on people every day. This is the first Bennguin I've ever written too, guess who jumped on the bandwagon. Moi. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Tyler can’t breathe; his clothes feel like a dead weight and his hands won’t stop shaking. He’s hit a drought, one he can’t seem to drag himself out of, to the point where he can’t  _ stop _ overthinking. He hides everything behind a smile, when really all he wants to say is  _ ‘I’m not okay’. Hopeless _ is all he seems to hear inside his head most days, which is then doubled over with- 

_ You can’t do anything right. _

_ You’re letting the team down. _

_ You’re just not good enough. _

Tears well in Tyler’s eyes, before he scrubs them away quickly, choking back the sob that gets caught in his throat. He starts to panic when his heart races too fast, it feels like he’s dying, like someone’s just squeezing his heart too tightly. 

_ What if he gets traded again? What will he do if he has to leave Jamie behind? What if- _

The tears start to fall because Tyler can’t hold it in anymore, and his grip tightens on the sink.  _ Weak, weak, weak  _ he hears inside his head, while a wave of nausea washes over him. His knees give out, so he sinks to his knees, his fingers digging into the fabric of his sweatpants.

“Tyler?”

Tyler’s lifts his head so quickly he almost gives himself whiplash, gaze settling on Jamie, who’s standing in the doorway with worry etched across his face. Jamie’s eyes are wide and soft, but he looks  _ sad _ when he sees Tyler kneeling on the floor. Tyler feels like he’s drowning all over again. He’d forgotten he was sharing a room with Jamie, now he was here, and he never wanted Jamie to see him like this. 

“ _ Jamie… _ ” Tyler chokes out.

Jamie kneels down beside Tyler, then pulls him into his arms, until Tyler is flush against his chest. He’s warm and safe; Tyler can already feel his body start to relax, the tears flowing freely now, as he buries his face into the crook of Jamie’s neck.

“I don’t know what I’m doing wrong,” he whispers.

“Hey, it’s gonna’ be okay.”

Tyler hugs Jamie tighter.

“ _ Fuck, _ I‘m sorry I let you and the guys down. I’m sorry,  _ I’m sorry. _ ”

Jamie moved back abruptly to cup Tyler’s face in his hands, his thumbs wiping away the tear tracks Tyler had stained down his cheeks.

“You didn’t. Christ Tyler, you  _ didn’t.  _ You’re gonna’ get through this yeah? We all hit a slump. But I need you to talk to me when things get this bad,” he says.

“I didn’t want to-”

“Please don’t. Don’t you dare tell me you didn’t want to ‘bother me with your bullshit’. It’s not bullshit, this is serious. ” Jamie breathes out, voice shaking.

Tyler sags into Jamie’s touch when he presses a soft kiss to his temple, before Jamie’s fingers card through his hair to comfort him. 

“I need to talk to someone Jamie,” he admits, sniffing loudly.

“We’ll get you help. We will, we’ll go talk to someone tomorrow. I promise.”

_ We will.  _ It’s never  _ you  _ since he’s been with Jamie, it’s always been  _ we.  _

“But, there’s a morning skate,” Tyler replies.

Jamie shakes his head.

“Your health comes first. I’ll skip morning skate to be there for you. You know you always come first, right?” 

Tyler nods and leans his forehead on Jamie’s, eyes closing shortly after.

“I love you.”

He opens them again when Jamie exhales shakily, notices the wetness in Jamie’s eyes, which only makes the panic spike again. 

“I love you too. More than you know.”

Tyler stops panicking as Jamie tilts his head up, kisses him chastely, then draws back.

“It’s okay to not feel okay Ty, just talk to me _ please. _ I won’t push you away,” Jamie soothes.

Tyler’s so tired, but he smiles, he smiles for Jamie.

“I know, babe, I know…”

Jamie moves them around so that he can rest against the wall, lets Tyler settle in between his legs, then wraps his arms around him. Tyler drops his head back on Jamie’s shoulder, as Jamie lazily rubs his hand in small circles on Tyler’s arm, lips lightly brushing over the side of his head.

“Jamie?” Tyler sighs, with content.

“Yeah?” he answers.

Tyler turns his head to kiss Jamie tenderly, his hand splayed on Jamie’s chest. And without uttering a word, Jamie knows what he’s saying...

_ Thank you. _

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr @ fourteen-ninety-one


End file.
